It has been more than a year since my last post. Blogging seemed a distant dream to me lately, but I finally found the time to visit my old place. Looking around felt like I left the place long enough for cobwebs to take over. For the past year I was only able to post one. I hope I can liven it up a bit soon.
What have I been doing with my life? Well believe it or not, I have been doing what I have always dreamed of becoming...a hands-on mother. Look at my babies, they are all grown up! Day in and day out when I wake up they get bigger and bigger and now, I am the smallest one in the family. Being away did give me time to pick up the pieces, learning how to live without househelp and thriving in my career. Learning to do things on my own, cooking, cleaning the house, making sure all is in place, taking care of the kids and keeping my husband happy. I didn't know I could do it, I didn't think I could survive...but I did...we did, helping each other.
My eldest daughter Pia is graduating high school next year. She's going to college! Even I could not wrap my head around the idea. I have been talking to her a lot lately, coaching her about life, telling her how things are outside, trying my best to arm her with information. Sigh, trying my best to make her ready to face life. How do you life-proof your child, anyways?
Each day when I talk to my kids our conversations go on different levels. I miss the days where they would hang around me, clinging to me and seemed to demand my every attention. Now it's my turn to be clingy. When I get home, they are busy doing their own thing, talking to friends, reading, doing stuff. I guess they are really grown up now... I must learn to accept the fact. For the longest time I comb my daughters' hair, fixing them up for school and when we go out...when I try to do that now, they say, "I can do it Mom." I always forget that they have their own style now, their own way of doing things. So this is how my mom felt when I told her I can do things on my own and didn't need her help. I didn't know how those words had the power to pinch a mother's heart. I sure felt mine flinch a bit.
This is life. Don't get me wrong, I am thankful for it. Thankful for the time I spend with the kids, thankful that I can give them motherly love, thankful that I get to hug them and kiss them and watch them grow up. I am thankful that I can serve them in my own way. I am honored to get front row seats to watch them blossom into the person they were meant to become. I tell my kids, that we come around this place only once, we have to leave the world a much better place than we first found it. I hope I can do that in my own little way.
Glad to be back with a post in Bloggerville.