Monday, September 28, 2009

Enjoy Life While There is still Time

The video above maybe a little graphic. Viewer discretion is advised.

I want to share with you the recent happenings in my country and my personal account and experience of the terrible flood the hit us.

It was raining non-stop since Friday evening. Hubby and I were watching TV and heard that Pasig was flooded. That was where my younger sister and her husband was living. I texted her and asked how things where in Pasig since they were also living with my bro-in-law's grandma who is 87 y/o. She replied with exclamation points "Hanggang ankle na inside the house!!!" (the water is up to my ankles!!) and that was the last time I heard from her.

I was texting here the whole afternoon and way into the evening. No response. I thought it odd that she won't reply to me and even when my mom and dad texted her. I felt that something was wrong.

What happened next was excruciating. News flash of ranging waters in Pasig and on different parts of Manila was shocking to say the least. How could this be happening. I was scared for my sister and her family. They lived in a one-storey house, with an old woman who is blind in one-eye. Where will they go? Are they still alive? Those where the thoughts that ran through my head. I've been calling their cellphones the whole night, but it was out of service. Panic and hysteria were bubbling inside my head. The storm and the fear that is forming inside my chest was devastating. Where they still alive?! I hoped so, I really hoped so.

I talked to my brother-in-law's younger sister; she told me the last time they talked to them was around 4pm Saturday. They urged them to transfer to an abandoned apartment in front of the house because it had a second floor. Then after that no news. Each hour that passed, fear and terror crept into our hearts. My dad did not take it well, he passed out. His blood pressure climbed high, he was beyond consolation. So is my mom.

No one could help us. The rescue was a slow, pain-staking process. The night passed and we wondered if they were safe, if they had food, if they were alive.

The following day, Sunday, we waited for news. There must be something, anything! But none came. It was after lunch already, I was sitting infront of my laptop with tears running down from my eyes as I frantically researched for agencies that could help us. It was getting dark again, still raining. Another night, not knowing if they were okay, if they were even alive. I posted messages in Facebook and waited for news. But still no news if there was any rescue going to happen. We called everyone we knew, all the government agencies, anyone who can help, strangers. But no one could help, all the government agencies were deployed, all we can do was wait...and hope that they were still alive.

September 27 4:47pm, my sis-in-law got a message from them, they were alive! Thank God! But they were stuck in the 2nd floor of the apartment, cold, no food and no idea if help was coming. That gave us hope, they were alive. We will move heaven and earth to get to them even if we had to swim there ourselves.

And as if, our prayers were heard and now being answered help started coming. A lot of people from Facebook responded to my urgent request for help. People we didn't know volunteered help, provided contact nos. of people who could. The phone rang non-stop relatives offering help came in. But still we couldn't do anything. The water was too high, we needed sophisticated equipments to get to them. If only there were more rubber boats available, if only we could get there faster, if only help was sure to come. We couldn't do anything but wait. Wait for any good soul to tell us that they will get them not minding the danger. My sister had hypoglycemia, her grandma was sickly.

After waiting for almost 2 days already, finally a break! People from Red Cross and the Armed Forces of the Philippines are going to get them. It 12:30am September 27 Monday. Riding 1 of the 4 rubber boats deployed for the whole City of Pasig they came back to our waiting and longing arms. Rescued at last.

My sister's account of what happened brought goosebumps in my arms, people wailing at night in the dark asking for help, asking for food, but they couldn't do anything...the water was high, way past the one-storey roof. There were dead bodies, mothers who gave birth prematurely, sick people in respirators who lost their lives due to hypothermia and because there was no electricity the respirators could not work anymore. No words could describe the devastation, the agony, the loss that people felt. Still even as I write this people are still on top of roofs, people are still starving waiting and hoping for help, people have lost their loved ones, people have lost their means to live.

A lot of properties were lost and damaged, cars, gadgets and clothes lost all at once. But these are only material things. Maybe it's time we invested in something that cannot be damaged, something that won't be affected by the strongest typhoon or disaster ... love for God and our

An eye-opener for me...a message so simple...enjoy life while there is still time.

Thursday, August 27, 2009

Thank You

For each new morning with its light,
For rest and shelter of the night,
For health and food,
For love and friends,
For everything Thy goodness sends.

Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803-1882)

Today I want to thank you Lord for giving me another year of life.

Thank you for my dad and mom who are always there to support me and love me and my family through thick and thin.

Thank you for my siblings, my brother and his family, my sister and her husband. I love them all.

Thank you for my husband, who constantly makes me feel that life is worth living, who always makes me smile and laugh. Whose craziness makes me forget the bad times. Whose love I would always cherish for the rest of my life.

Thank you for my lovely daughters Pia and Zoe whose mere existence brings me soooo much joy and happiness. They give me a reason to live each day and want to be the best mother they could ever wish for.

I also want to thank you for giving me so many friends whom I can count on, who I can laugh with and cry with and get crazy with. Friends who are there in the best and worst times of my life.

Again I thank you.

Monday, August 10, 2009

Begin Today

I find it ironic that I am turning another year older in the next few weeks and I cannot say that I have a fool-proof plan for my future. Something that every responsible adult should have before they charter the many oceans of life.

I sometimes live for today and am guilty of leaving tomorrow to God. Don't get me wrong, I am not totally irresponsible. I have life insurance policies, a pension plan, a good health care plan and a few investments. Nothing ludicrous but a little nest egg for my family in case I become permanently err unavailable. But one must also realize that when you leave tomorrow to God, that means you are in charge of what happens to you today.

Being in charge of today is a big responsibility, because what you do today affects future plans and future realities.

Each day I struggle to live my life to the full. But oftentimes I think I fail to make the most of it. Each working day I think I miss out on the most important moments of my kids life. I content myself into looking at their day from my nanny's recount and stories, from my mom's loving eyes and through my dad's adoring stories. I would call home to check if there are assignments to be done and school supplies to buy and if the kids had preferences for tomorrow's snacks. It was the only way I could be there for them during the day that I am working.

My five-year-old daughter now knows how to contact me at work and what time she would call. There are times when I wasn't able to answer her call because I was in a meeting she would leave messages in my answering machine...and I would feel guilty as hell. Some mornings she would be grumpy when I wake her up and hurry her to the bathroom to give her a bath, she would tell me "why are you always in a rush mommy?" - I wanted to tell her because I want so much to be the one to go to school with you and your sister. To wait for you when you get home and cook your lunch, do your homework and play with you after school...but I can't so I just have to content myself with the few minutes that I can kiss you and give you a bath and I can comb your hair and blow small kisses before I rush yet again to work.

Life is a series of compromises for me. I win some, I lose some. And for each moment that I spend away from my family I want to make sure that I spend it wisely. I count the seconds, the minutes the hours that I would go home and embrace my babies again. Here's something that I love to read whenever I have bad days. I keep it tucked away somewhere for me to read. Here goes:

If you woke up this morning
with more health than illness,
you are more blessed than the
million who won't survive the week.

If you have never experience
the danger of battle,
the loneliness of imprisonment,
the agony of torture or
the pangs of starvation,
you are ahead of 20 million people
around the world.

If you attend a church meeting
without fear of harassment,
arrest, torture, or death,
you are more blessed than almost
three billion people in the world.

If you have food in your refrigerator,
clothes on your back, a roof over
your head and a place to sleep,
you are richer than 75% of this world.

If you have money in the bank,
in your wallet, and spare change
in a dish someplace, you are among
the top 8% of the world's wealthy.

If your parents are still married and alive,
you are very rare,
especially in the United States.

If you hold up your head with a smile
on your face and are truly thankful,
you are blessed because the majority can,
but most do not

If you can hold someone's hand, hug them
or even touch them on the shoulder,
you are blessed because you can
offer God's healing touch.

If you can read this,
you are more blessed than over
two billion people in the world
that cannot read anything at all.

You are so blessed in ways
you may never even know.

“love life, engage in it, give it all you've got. love it with a passion, because life truly does give back, many times over, what you put into it” ~ Maya Angelou.

In case we forget, we can always begin living today.

Wednesday, August 05, 2009

A Heart of Hope

Today our former President Corazon C. Aquino was laid to rest. The country mourned the loss. After fighting for her life, the cancer won. Before she died she shared a most wonderful prayer. A prayer for a happy death. I remember my dad's elder sister who shared with me a similar prayer.

Prayer for a Happy Death
By Corazon Aquino

Almighty God, most merciful Father
You alone know the time
You alone know the hour
You alone know the moment
When I shall breathe my last.

So, remind me each day,
most loving Father
To be the best that I can be.
To be humble, to be kind,
To be patient, to be true.
To embrace what is good,
To reject what is evil,
To adore only You.

When the final moment does come
Let not my loved ones grieve for long.
Let them comfort each other
And let them know
how much happiness
They brought into my life.
Let them pray for me,
As I will continue to pray for them,
Hoping that they will always pray
for each other.

Let them know that they made possible
Whatever good I offered to our world.
And let them realize that our separation
Is just for a short while
As we prepare for our reunion in eternity.

Our Father in heaven,
You alone are my hope.
You alone are my salvation.
Thank you for your unconditional love, Amen.

This prayer was published in the Philippine Daily Inquirer last July 10, 2009.

I also want to share this beautiful song composed by M. Franciso SJ, it's called "Your Heart Today"

“Love comes to those who still hope even though they've been disappointed, to those who still believe even though they've been betrayed, to those who still love even though they've been hurt before.”

Sunday, August 02, 2009

If I was 17 Again

It seems like ages ago when I wore my college uniform, I was in all white. I had a hard time keeping it that way as I made my way to the University, it always rained and my pencil-cut skirt seemed to manage to rip itself up to my booty. Good thing I have my mini sewing kit tucked away in my bag. I was the only girl in the last row and I'd hate it when the boys would snicker and made fun of me.

I also wondered how I was going to cram all those medical words and chemical equations in my tired head and keep up with my professors. Flunking is never an option. We started out as 46 students in our class and sometime before the last semester ended we were trimmed down to 32. Fourteen students either dropped out or was forced out. Getting good grades and not flunking my subjects were all that was on my mind - err and also how to rinse out all the chlorine and drying my long black hair after of swimming class --- aaarghh! that was probably one of the hardest part of college life. LOL!

And then there was Medical School. That was the ultimate goal. Boys were just not an option at that time, although there were a lot of good-looking medical students in my building. There just wasn't time for that. I could barely look up while I walked to my classes! My books were sooo darned heavy. All those subjects with "-ology" in the end. I had tons of those.

So today, I was thinking and looking back (one tends to do that a lot when one gets older I guess) - I wondered what would I tell myself if I had the chance to talk to "me". And I figured I had a lot of things to tell myself. I made a little list.

1. Relax - I was a little uptight at that age, I did not socialize a lot. Well partly because my dad was a little strict and secondly I was not so into it too. I was a little hard on myself then. I was always in a rush.

2. Listen to your mom and dad when they say that "Time is Gold". Procrastination in any stage in life is never good.

3. Don't be in a hurry all the time. Enjoy the moment and savor every little experience you get out of life. Who knows you might need to pick that memory out at a later time. I guess this happens when you don't get lesson no. 2.

4. Save, save, save. Save your allowance for important stuff. Something that could enhance your self-esteem. Avoid spending your money on non-essentials like make up or gadgets.

5. Don't be in a hurry to grow up. Your time will come. Enjoy the moment while someonelse is in charge of paying the bills. Growing up means more responsibilities and that includes paying bills. Being young and learning the ropes will build your character. Be friends with people who are independent, they have a lot of experiences to share.

6. Don't get credit cards. If you know how to spend your money wisely and you can live within your means, then for goodness sakes don't get that credit card. If your spending gets out of control - you could head to a financial meltdown in the future. Trust me steer clear.

7. Soak up all the wisdom the elders are imparting to you. Listen to dad's talk on choosing well whether he's talking about finding the right partner in life or choosing the right friends. He will also say "never giving up your ideals". And then there's mom's words on managing your time well and the wisdom of loving with all your heart but always leaving something for yourself "just-in-case".

8. Be confident. Don't be easily intimidated by other people. They are also afraid of new things just like you. They just know how to hide it better. Believe me I met a lot of people like this and they also have high positions in the corporate world.

9. Love yourself. Don't let others walk all over you. You have your own identity and your own special talents and gifts. Learn how to use it and it will serve you well. That hobby may make you a millionaire someday. Remember those who know their passion, never had to work a day in their lives.

10. Trust God and your family. They will love you unconditionally whether you have "unclear" skin, wavy hair, a fashion disaster or a social outcast. They will love you no-matter-what. And you know after all these - their love is all that matters.

We may not be able to turn back the clock and be 17 again but hey we were able to taste the elixir of life. It's our turn to guide that someone who is lost and finding themselves amongst crowd.

And in the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years. ~ Abraham Lincoln

Saturday, June 20, 2009

What Matters Most

I wrote this post years ago about my wedding day and my dad. Because it's father's day I wanted to share it again.

Have you heard the song "what matters most" by Kenny Rankin? I love that song. I requested my dad to sing that song for me on my wedding day. I was so excited when he agreed, however when THE DAY came, he kinda chickened out. Instead a string quartet played the song while I was walking down the aisle. my eyes were so misty, i couldn't see a thing. in my mind, it was my dad who was singing for me.

I asked my dad why he backed out. He told me he felt so emotional that he couldn't even speak. the lyrics were simple, the message was clear. this song somehow depicts my farewell bid to my childhood. it was like saying, "mom and dad, the days that I spent with you had been sweet and unforgettable and now as I enter my new life I would like to thank you for the wonderful childhoold that i had, it will be the foundation i'll use to build my own family.

Thank you for showing me how to love unconditionally, that kind of love is very hard to come by. Thank you for teaching me that it did not matter that our lives were not so perfect as long as we were happy there was no problem greater than that. Thank you for letting me discover myself and teaching me to love the "me" that i found staring back in the mirror. Thank you for loving me in the good and bad times, just knowing you are there for me helped me become strong. thank you for being there for me as i learned to stand on my own and experience life. and thank you for opening my eyes to the world, letting me know that who I am and how I deal with other people will determine how happy and successful my life would be.

you both taught me it did not matter that loving someone could sometimes hurt so much you ached all over, what mattered was I was capable of loving - not all people have that gift. =) here's the lyrics of the song. hope you like it too

It's not how long we held each other's hand
What matters is how well we loved each other
It's not how far we travelled on our way
Of what we found to say
It's not the spring you see, but all the shades of green

It's not how long I held you in my arms
What matters is how sweet the years together
It's not how many summertimes we had to give to fall
The early morning smiles we tearfully recall
What matters most is that we loved at all.

It's not how many summertimes we had to give to fall
The early morning smiles we tearfully recall
What matters most is that we loved at all.

What matters most is that we loved at all.

I love you soooo much Dad - Happy Father's Day!

incidentally the picture in this post is not my wedding picture but that of my sister's. i love this picture. from left to right, that's my hubby, me, my mom, my sister, my dad and my brother. the flower girls are katrina and pia.

I would also like to say Happy Father's Day to hubby - the most wonderful dad to my precious daughters. Thank you for coming to my life.

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Totally My Girl

The other day my ten-year-old daughter Ysabel asked me. "Mom, is it okay if I blog just like you?" I didn't hesitate and told her "Sure! wanna do it now?"

My eldest daughter is into books and she loves to write too. I cannot even begin to tell you how much she loves books. Whenever we go out she would always ask me, "Mom, I did very well in my exam, will you buy me a book?" And just like that she has started her book collection. It's something her dad and I support with all our hearts.

During Christmas when most children would ask for toys, the latest gadgets my eldest daughter would tell her godmothers and godfathers that she would love it so much if they bought her books for Christmas. And she was wise too, she would ask her godparents and grandparents different books so she would be able to maximize her growing wish list. This way no books were bought twice! Attah girl!

Together we designed her blog. Of course it has to be pink and there has to be a ballerina there. She also wanted to showcase the books she already have. We are still in the process of designing and I was amazed at how well she has envisioned what her blog would look like. She wrote the contents of her blog, even her profile description. She was funny and funky at the same time. She asked for my help to check her grammar and how she wanted her post to look like. And I enjoyed helping her do it.

I wanted to encourage her to write because I think this is a place she can develop herself to her full potential.

So to my sweet daughter, mommy supports you all the way. Keep on writing love. If you want to check out her blog please don't hesitate here's the link Totally Me

Sunday, May 31, 2009

No Boundaries

One evening on the way home, hubby and I were having a discussion about relationships with people. We were talking about people who became close to us, became part of our daily lives and all of a sudden they say goodbye and we get hurt - almost betrayed. I told him maybe I shouldn't care so much, maybe I shouldn't be so attached, maybe if I don't get too close I'll survive. He says, I was going about this the wrong way. He said after all this time I still don't get it.

I get hurt because I always think in terms of forever.Well maybe he was right. I do tend to believe, well hope actually that good times...could last forever, I couldn't help it. Who wouldn't want something good to last a lifetime? Why couldn't it last a little while longer? That's why I fear death so much because that puts a period on my existence, on the existence of the people I love and care about. I remember my dad telling me I shouldn't fear it, one's existence does not end in death...if you loved the person deeply enough...then love transcends even in death. And he says death will come, that is certain. :( But until then there is only thing that stand between me and my happiness - ME. Because love has no boundaries.

I guess that was why I was particularly struck by a song written by Cara DioGuardi, its called No Boundaries. I loved the lyrics of the song so here I am sharing it with you.

seconds, hours, so many days
you know what you want but how long can you wait
every moment lasts forever
when you feel you've lost your way

and what if my chances were already gone
i started believing that i could be wrong
but you gave me one good reason
to fight and never walk away
so here i am still holding on

with every step you climb another mountain
every breath its harder to believe
you'll make it through the pain, weather the hurricanes
to get to that one place
when you think the road is going no where
just when you almost gave up on your dreams
they take you by the hand
and show you that you can
there are no boundaries

i fought to the limit to stand on the edge
what if today is as good as it gets
dont know where the future is heading
but nothing is gonna bring me down

I've jumped every bridge
I've run every line
I've risked being safe
i always knew why, i always knew why
so here i am still holding on

you can go higher
you can go deeper
there are no boundaries
above and beneath you
break every rule 'cause there is nothing between you and your dreams
there are no boundaries

“I have found the paradox, that if you love until it hurts, there can be no more hurt, only more love.” ~ Mother Teresa

hugs Pictures, Images and Photos are you willing to take the risk? to LOVE without boundaries?

Saturday, May 09, 2009

Before I was a Mom

Before I was a Mom

Before I was a Mom -
I slept as late as I wanted and never worried about how late I got into
bed. I brushed my hair and my teeth everyday.

Before I was a Mom -
I cleaned my house each day. I never tripped over toys or forgot words to
a lullaby. I didn't worry whether or not my plants were poisonous. I never
thought about immunizations.

Before I was a Mom -
I had never been puked on - Pooped on - Spit on - Chewed on, or Peed on. I
had complete control of my mind and My thoughts. I slept all night.

Before I was a Mom -
I never held down a screaming child so that doctors could do tests...or
give shots. I never looked into teary eyes and cried. I never got
gloriously happy over a simple grin. I never sat up late hours at night
watching a baby sleep.

Before I was a Mom -
I never held a sleeping baby just because I didn't want to put it down. I
never felt my heart break into a million pieces when I couldn't stop the
hurt. I never knew that something so small could affect my life so much. I
never knew that I could love someone so much. I never knew I would love
being a Mom.

Before I was a Mom -
I didn't know the feeling of having my heart outside my body. I didn't
know how special it could feel to feed a hungry baby. I didn't know that
bond between a mother and her child. I didn't know that something so small
could make me feel so important.

Before I was a Mom -
I had never gotten up in the middle of the night every 10 minutes to make
sure all was okay.

Before I was a Mom -
I had never known The warmth, The joy, The love, The heartache, The
wonderment or the satisfaction of being a Mom. I didn't know I was capable
of feeling so much before I was a Mom.

Happy mother's day to my beloved mom, who always inspire me to be a good mom myself. I love you sooooo much. To all my mommy blogger friends - Happy mother's day to you all!

Friday, April 10, 2009

Touch and Go

Yesterday afternoon I went to my aunt's funeral. She's my mom's older sister. I remembered her as someone who was jolly, always cracking up jokes and taking me to places. I remembered how she always sided with me when I didn't want to have my long black hair cut during summer vacation. It's been a long time since I last saw her and it was sad that when I had to see her again it was at her funeral.

When I got to their place I felt really nostalgic, I remembered their place quite differently back then. I remembered it as a huge playground, where every nook and cranny was a magical place of make-believe. Now, my little playmates had kids like me, but their kids were older...their kids had kids of their own! I also saw my cousins, former playmates I seldom see anymore. And to my chagrin, I was informed just today - that I am now a grandma! Whoa! Good thing my grandson was sooooooo adorable that I forgave my niece for making me a very young grandma. Hehehe.

I was silent during the drive home, I couldn't help but think about the past and the present and how they are so intricately woven to how my future would be like. Life is so fragile, sometimes it's hard to hold on to it, it's always touch and go. I was sad to know that I wouldn't see my aunt anymore, but I was surprised at how strong her presence had been imprinted in my life; and somehow it comforted me to know that she will never really be gone nor forgotten in my heart.

Here's an old song by Rupert Holmes I heard on the radio the other day. A super dooper oldie. It tells how life couldn't last forever but promises that love could make it worth while. I'd like to share with you the lyrics.

Nobody said that
Life is always fair
Sometimes it clips your wings
While you're in mid-air
But there's a thread
Between your life and mine
And when you're losin' hope
This rope won't unwind

Hold on tight
'Cause life is touch and go
It's sink or swim
But never doubt
If you're out on a limb
I'll get the call
To break your fall
I'll never leave you
Even when life
Is touch and go
Or hit and run
We'll never break
If we take it as one
I'm here to stay,
I pray you know
I'll never touch
I'll never touch and go

Someday you'll find
There's nothin' in the night
That wasn't there before
You turned out the light
Straight from your mind
The monster 'neath your bed
The voices in the hall
They're all in your head

Hold on tight
'Cause life is touch and go
It's sink and swim
But never doubt
If you're out on a limb
I'll get the call
To break your fall
I'll never leave you
Even when life
Is touch and go
Or hit and run
We'll never break
If we take it as one
I'm here to stay,
I pray you know
I'll never touch
I'll never touch and go

When you feel lost
You're only spun around
Tumbled and tossed
But never run around
Life is a townful
Of strangers at best
I'll help you home
God help the rest

Hold on tight
'Cause life is touch and go
It's sink and swim
But never doubt
If you're out on a limb
I'll get the call
To break your fall
I'll never leave you
Even when life
Is touch and go
Or hit and run
We'll never break
If we take it as one
I'm here to stay,
I pray you know
I'll never touch
I'll never touch and go

Life is touch and go
It's sink or swim
But never doubt
If you're out on a limb
I'll get the call...

That it will never come again is what makes life so sweet. ~ Emily Dickinson

Tuesday, April 07, 2009

Breathe Again


The past few months have been terribly busy months for me. It feels totally wonderful having time to sit infront of my laptop and write something down. I missed Bloggerville soooo much. It's so good to breathe easily and not make life-altering decisions even for just a little while.

I have been in this constant tug-o-war between my work-life and family-life. I feel like I've been crossing too many bridges and shaking too many hands of late. The good news is I got a promotion! An unexpected prize for all the times I had to be away from my daughters. Another thing? It's summer time! My kids are now on vacation and that means beach time, swimming and travel! The crux though is, how do I squeeze in all these things in my busy life? Sigh.

Time magazine says the most important commodity today is "work". I am thankful that both hubby and I still have our work. I used to hate the corporate world, probably because I have this obscure picture of myself as a domesticated wife, raising my kids and running my home. Something I perceived as simple, do-able, easy. But then life has something else in store for me. I didn't know that I could juggle too! I was surprised to know that I could be a manager and be a mom at the same time and do good at both. The thing that I used to hate is now a challenge for me. I want to be good at it everyday. I have now shifted from mommy books to books about leadership. LOL! I am now friends with authors like Jack Welch, Warren Buffet, Stephen Covey, Robert Greene and of course John Maxwell.

My planner is my bestfriend, she manages both my work and my family life. Without her? I would be lost and clueless! If someone stole her, I'd pay the ransom instantly! Haha! I found it hard at first, I have met and dealt with some very hardened people but I have finally learned to adjust and not lose myself in the process. Some people could be very cruel. You could be friends today and enemies the next. You could be swallowed alive and not know it. Ahhh, enough about that. Today I promised myself to learn how to breath again. To enjoy this HOLY WEEK with my family doing simple stuff. Breathe in and out. That's my goal. Here's a quote that caught my eye today, hope you guys like it.

This is the beginning of a new day.
God has given me this day to use as I will.
I can waste it or use it for good.
What I do today is important, because
I am exchanging a day of my life for it.
When tomorrow comes,
this day will be gone forever,
leaving in its place something
that I have traded for it.
I want it to be gain, not loss;
good not evil; success not failure;
in order that I shall not regret
the price I paid for it.
~ author unknown

Breathe my friends and always make time for life.

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Love Sweet Love

Okay, it's just two days till Valentine's day and yes - I still wonder what hubby has in store for me on that day.

After all these years it's really sweet that he still comes up with some tricks up his sleeve during that day. And at the office, I am always the envy of the girls, married women too, because hubby always sends me the biggest bouquet of flowers. I would always blush a bright red color whenever the security guard would come over my table to deliver the flowers. The girls and even the boys would stand up and ogle. Some of my married colleagues would complain that their husbands aren't as sweet anymore.

My male colleagues would always wonder how hubby was able to buy the nice ones since they would always be sold out this time of the year. Hubby would say smugly, "it's because I planned ahead." Well you can't help but admire a man with a plan like that, can you?

Here's a re-post of a poem that hubby wrote for me way back when he attended a training workshop. They were asked to listen to a song and the song they were listening to evoked memories of me walking down the aisle and how he felt while he was waiting for me walk towards him to the altar.

Walking down the aisle
feels like a child getting a candy
the joy, the bliss, the happiness
is beyond what words can explain

Each second of waiting
seems like waiting for eternity
each step is like a loud clanging of bells

As the woman of your love and life comes near,
your heart pounds,
ready to explode

Like fireworks on New Year's Eve
the feeling flows
like a raging water
flowing from the heavens

To Hubby ~ I love you, for putting your hand into my heart and passing over all the foolish, weak things that you can’t help dimly seeing there, and for drawing out into the light all the beautiful belongings that no one else had looked quite so far enough to find ~Roy Croft

Happy Valentine's Day to my girls, my mom an dad, my brother and his family, my sister and hubby...and to all my lovely friends here in bloggerville! I wish you all LOVE sweeeeeet LOVE.

Thursday, January 29, 2009

Do You Still Dream?

I woke up one morning and felt a little odd. I used to remember all of my dreams vividly, like I was watching a movie in my head and in technicolor! That morning I felt like I had a dreamless night, like my dream bucket was empty. Nothing spectacular, no splashing colors. It was a bit on the gray side. Like I was in a super massive black hole. Was I still dreaming? I asked myself and figured maybe I am. But what were they about? I don't remember anything.

Hmmmm. I mulled over it a little bit more as I was headed to the office. Usually, there was something I wanted to buy, or some place I wanted to go, or something I wanted to do. But that day? Nothing. Caput! And I couldn't say that I was breezing through life content with everything. Well, come to think of it, maybe I am content. But no, something was missing. I couldn't quite put my finger on it. The pull, the thrill...the passion? For a panic-stricken moment I thought, had I lost it? My dreams? Gone?!

Squishing my mind a bit more, I tried to think about something that I wanted so terribly right here, right now? Thinking still. Hmmmm....Shaking my head in frustration and chagrin - all I could come up with, was an utterly neurotic un-funny girlish answer, err Edward Cullen (the Twillight guy)?Huh! Rolling my eyes. What was that? I thought frustated. That was utterly uncreative of me. But you see, there was a sense of emptiness creeping up behind me.

Where was all the introspection? The deep answers to my life's purpose? Well, I guess I still know my purpose in life. And yup, I still have that whole list of valid reasons to wake up each morning tucket away in my brain, but - but...but what? It was faintly frustrating, like I was missing something but I don't know what it is yet. Acck! I guess I should let it go for awhile. Maybe it will dawn on me. I sure hope so. I remembered someone told me never ever stop dreaming. Is that what's happening? I ran out of dreams to dream?

In life, many thoughts are born in the course of a moment, an hour, a day. Some are dreams, some visions. Often, we are unable to distinguish between them. To some, they are the same; however, not all dreams are visions. Much energy is lost in fanciful dreams that never bear fruit. But visions are messages from the Great Spirit, each for a different purpose in life. Consequently, one person's vision may not be that of another. To have a vision, one must be prepared to receive it, and when it comes, to accept it. Thus when these inner urges become reality, only then can visions be fulfilled. The spiritual side of life knows everyone's heart and who to trust. How could a vision ever be given to someone to harbor if that person could not be trusted to carry it out. The message is simple: commitment precedes vision. ~ High Eagle

So tell me? Do you guys still dream? What do you guys dream about?

Wednesday, January 07, 2009


The new year started with a bang as usual. My family watched the fireworks display and welcomed the new year making our own noise in our bedroom verandah. It was drizzling so we were not able to stay outside so much. I had a terrible cold that day, my husband had a slight fever and my two daughters had cough. Haha! And you might think that a little thing like that would stop us from greeting the new year as loudly as we can. Not!

As usual I make a quick recap of the year that was and I could not help but smile, frown and feel sad at some events that took place in my life. It was the life I made, the life I am continuously weaving. What I am really surprised about is how much my daughters have grown and I am still amazed at how much they know when I start to compare my life as a child then.

With them around, now I have no control over my own stuff. As soon as I get home, my five-year-old would ask if she could tinker with my iPhone and my ten-year-old would ask permission to use my laptop. Whoa! There goes my short moments of err "away" time, I think groaning. Now I am forced to content myself to read. I call it invasion! They have dominated even my moments for a small recreation. And I guess, that's my bit about my lack of, err, new posts here. LOL! I frowned a little as I think about that. Should I have been sharing er make-up lessons with them? Aaacck! I am afraid I would probably disappoint them in that direction. Lipstick is the only make up I have in my bag and a colorless lip gloss which does not constitute much. And I somehow felt a bit satisfied that they would grow up like me, no frizz no frill type of gal. LOL!

I am also amazed at how much my eldest daughter loved to read. She devours books and craves them by the lot. She sometimes reads three books simultaneously and would you believe she has started to read the Twillight Saga as well! she's asking me to download audio books so she can listen to them in the iPod. I always think better that than something else. My little five-year-old is into drawing stuff and making up stories in her little notebook. She also plays some kids games online (don't worry with parental guidance) and I am amazed at how she can outplay me with the new games. I envy them with all the choices they have now. LOL!

I watch contently the little bubble of happiness that is my family. My husband who is always there, ever supportive and ever loving. My mom and dad, always there when I needed them, never stopping to love me and my family. My siblings and their kids all make my life simply worth living for.

This new year, I have vowed to make new beginnings, grow a little more (probably not vertically but in some aspects in my life), and go with the flow.

HAPPY NEW YEAR to you all!